not exactly on April Fool day but in the the same month with it
After creating a huge walls for almost most guys can break into, a guy managed to break the walls and be in my heart.
His presence were at the time i gave up on life. When every night , the only thing i have wished for was there is no tomorrow for me
He came at that time
Treating him in a way he might not like me when he see me as I am dark skinned, tomboish
He expressed his feeling that he likes me and would like to proceed knowing me.
Despite he knows i was not interested in knowing him much in the beginning
Soon after, i said yes to marry him
He is not rich neither has a good social background
Looked at him just like how my dad started his life with my mum. Exactly with nothing
I had hope , trust and confidence in him. We might have the same journey how my parents is now.
Its shattered after 6 months near the engagement date.
Misunderstanding happened
Engagement was cancelled
Wedding plan cancelled
I still loved him despite misunderstandings
Took an effort not to lose him
Fought as much i could to get him
Then i realized I fought alone.
ALL ALONE
As stupid as any girls can be, i was stupid too
I was a fool too
He did not fight for me
nor willing to take the risk to keep me
All was my fault and none was his
How long to go on being stupid
I love him much that i would want to fight to be with him
But how much strength do i have after knowing the reality fighting all alone
A life lesson
I really wanted to love only one person who is my husband
I gave that to him
Now its all broken into pieces
Allah's game
and i failed again
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